Scary New Steps=True Determination?

I’m pretty pleased with myself thus far today. I had a slightly out of control weekend in terms of eating. Now, granted, I didn’t go crazy like I used to, but I definitely ate more than I should have and I didn’t workout near as hard to burn that off. But I’m not beating myself up today. I’m taking new steps today and starting fresh. I made cupcakes for my coworker’s birthday (I’ll share the recipe and pics later). I hear these cupcakes were heavenly. Yesterday I managed to only taste a bit of the icing and the cake…not eat a whole one. Today I opted to not eat one either. Plus, we took the coworker to lunch and I only ate one slice of pizza instead of 2, like I normally would. I’m quite proud of myself for keeping the pizza count low and avoiding cupcakes that smell great and got such rave reviews.

The scary new step? My trainer now has access to my food diary on My Fitness Pal. It’s terrifying to have someone look at what you eat…I mean, when you have the dieting (or lack of) history that I do. And you’re someone who is still climbing out of the binge canyon. It’s a scary step but one that I hope keeps me on track. Having someone see what you eat is scarier than just telling someone what you eat, yeah? If I track honestly, I can’t lie about the chips and queso I binged on when I go out to a Mexican restaurant.

Hopefully though, knowing she’s looking will help me clean up my eating and not just stop tracking everything like I’ve been doing faithfully for the last 2 weeks.

But I look back at my last year, and I would’ve never dreamed of letting someone in that close a year ago. But I’ve come a long way in the last year. I lost 25 pounds in 2012 and I know if I’d stuck to it faithfully all year, it would be much more. So 2013, here’s looking at you, kid!

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